What Sucks Is That My ID Says I'm 25

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the ones you love. I did that last night. Actually I'm lying.. I half-used Eli as an excuse to check out Paper, a new "hipster" night that I was both confused and frightened by. Since he needed to write about it for the Phoenix, I was able to go under the guise of being a supportive girlfriend. What we ended up learning, as Eli nicely put it last night, is that there's a difference between something being cool, and something being all ages.

We got there earlyish, about 10pm, and found ourselves a safe spot at the end of the bar where we could see the stage, the dance floor and the door. It was empty at first, so I began to think that Carl's visit last week (where he said there were 450 people), was a fluke. I was wrong. It started to fill up at about 10:30 (enough time for the OC to get over and for the girls to pull on their too-short skirts and fluff their ironic haircuts), with a steady line out the door for the rest of the night. After two shitty bands (Veda and Honeyhander), the live DJ came on. We were a little relieved at that point since we were convinced that the a-holes were just going to be blasting music from their laptop playlist all night.. He started out pretty decent, better than I expected, and got people dancing.

I guess I should first explain the people that were there. See, this is a 18+ night. And apparently there's also the stipulation that you have to really really wish you lived in New York. It was almost like watching little kids play dress up. Sparkly grandma shirts topped with oversized belts, high heeled shoes, tight pants, tiny skirts.... Half the people that had wristbands must have had access to a great fake ID dealer. They also didn't realize that when you buy a drink, you're supposed to tip the bartender.

So we sat there, silenting judging, feeling old, rolling our eyes, but tolerating it all because it was amusing... And then there was the final straw. The DJ threw on Popozao. The Kevin Federline single. You've never seen two people leave a place so fast.

As I was thrusting Plan fliers into the hands of those still standing outside, one girl said "I don't know about that Great Scott place." Yeah.